Roses Caramel Kegs Has there ever been a food item which has such little nutritional merit as a box of chocolates? The Christmas tin of Cadbury’s Roses is the holder of dreams and the deliverer of disappointment. So many rustling wrappers and coloured foils, that every time you open the tin you think that you’re […]

Bacon roll (with milk) Streaky bacon, grilled to the point of crispness, soft white bread rolls, a keen squeeze of ketchup and a glass of cow juice. A fine balance of the salty and the bland. Dairlylea & Jacobs crackers Dairylea triangles stopped being called cheese a while ago, but that doesn’t detract from how […]

Salt & pepper squid Things taste better deep-fried and given the nature of the cephalopod and how it likes to be cooked, deep frying is perfect. Very hot and quick. Toss in a light coating and some seasoning and it works perfectly. If, and when, you find a good vendor, treasure them. In amongst the […]

Instant noodles Whatever the flavour, one packet isn’t quite enough and two leaves you feeling the wrong side of nauseous. But oh, the glory of a deep-fried-dried-foodstuff, that can be reconstituted in under 3 mins with its little sachet of MSG enriched bath salts. My favourite brand was Doll, but you can’t seem to find […]

Fishfinger sandwich I usually admonish people for deviating from my food rules, but when it comes to the triumphant fishfinger sandwich I find it hard not to take anyone, who has their own time-honoured way, by the hand and shake it warmly. Mayo, Tartare, cheese, white, brown there is no right or wrong, just variations […]

It seems arbitrary and rather ad hoc, but there is a logic behind the choice of foods on the list. Everything on there has to be a food, rather than an ingredient. I felt there was no point starting to include individual ingredients (onions being the exception that proves the rule), that way madness lies! […]